


convallaria

by setgo



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Birthday Party, F/F, Fluff, Mentions of Suicide Ideation, Nonbinary My Unit | Byleth, Oneshot, Realizations of Self Worth, We Are All Love Marianne von Edmund
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:34:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21591565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/setgo/pseuds/setgo
Summary: Marianne blinked. “What is all this?”The rest of the Deer were precariously stacked about the room, draping fabric and paper all over the room. Brightly colored clutter filled the tables, hemming the eyes like the cloud of surprisingly comforting smells that hit Marianne as she entered.“Huh?!” Hilda’s eyes were wide in disbelief, “Don’t tell me you forgot! It’s your birthday!”
Relationships: Marianne von Edmund & The Golden Deer, Marianne von Edmund/Hilda Valentine Goneril
Comments: 10
Kudos: 157
Collections: Pheonix's Fluff Collection





	convallaria

**Author's Note:**

> Happy late Birthday Marianne my sweet angel...
> 
> Okay, Marianne is such a good character and I was hit by the urge to shower her in appreciation. I'm a bit late on her birthday, but my love is still there. I admire her growth and resolve to live for herself and those she cares for, her fellow deer who helped her find herself.

On a brisk autumn day, Marianne walked into the classroom to find absolute chaos.

The rest of the deers were precariously stacked about the room, draping fabric and paper all over the room. Brightly colored clutter filled the tables, hemming the eyes like the cloud of surprisingly comforting smells that hit Marianne as she entered.

She looked from table to table, surprised face to surprised face. Raphael was in the midst of balancing Lysithea on his shoulders as she strung a blue banner across the blackboard, Claude arranging something on the row of desks.

Hilda made the first move, flinging her arms up in glee, “Surprise, Marianne!” The rest of the Deer echoed her in a chorus of “surprise!”

Marianne blinked. “What is all this?”

Her classmates stared back.

“Huh?!” Hilda’s eyes were wide in disbelief, “Don’t tell me you _forgot!_ And after all this work I put in for you!"

_…Had she done something?_

It’s your party!”

“I…” Marianne furrowed her brows. She could have sworn Wyvern Moon had only just ended but, oh, the Faerghus Founding Day banquet had been just a few days prior, hadn’t it? And then - the realization clicked.

The 23rd of Red Wolf Moon…

It was her birthday.

“Ah! I - I’m sorry for all the trouble, you didn’t need to -“ Marianne began to apologize, but was swiftly interrupted by the swish of a pink pigtail.

“Don’t even worry about it! It was a lot of fun, actually,” Hilda gestured at the festive classroom. It certainly was intricate: every inch of the walls was covered in paper and ribbon, some clumsily cut into the shape of what… could be interpreted as a horse. The scent of lavender filled the room, and Marianne soon realized the source of it: an expensive looking teapot made of an ivory white material painted with tiny elegant swirls of blue.

“That was Lorenz’ idea,” Claude explained, gesturing to the teapot, “but Teach knew your favorite flavor, so maybe it was more of a joint effort?”

Lorenz scoffed, “I’ll not have you downplay my contributions, Claude!” I’ll have you know I was one of the first on board for this little festivity in the first place, and not to mention my invaluable assistance in gathering the decorations -"

“Yeah, yeah, we get it,” Leonie waved his protests off, “Do you like the flowers? I’m not too good with that sort of thing, but you said you liked them a while back, so…”

Marianne cast a gaze at the soft bouquets. Delicate bells, no bigger than her thumb but cascading down the stem. Mostly white, but an unusual sight of bright violet versions mixed artfully amongst the rest.

”Oh, they’re lovely…” Marianne muttered. Leonie pumped her fist in excitement, much to Claude's amusement.

“And we’ve got gifts!” Raphael exclaimed. He hefted up a heavy-looking pile of hastily wrapped packages in all shapes and sizes. He nodded his head to a surprisingly petite box covered in brown paper, “That one’s mine!”

Marianne could feel a burning tickle in the corners of her eyes, a heavy thump in her chest as she surveyed the room and her classmates. _You don't deserve -_

“Hey, where’s Ignatz?” Leonie asked.

“I saw him after dinner yesterday…” Hilda tapped one finger on her chin, “carrying some big case or something weird like that. Maybe he overslept?”

Lysithea ducked underneath the taller girl, pointing to a towering, warm pink and white cake frosted with unsteady hands, topped with a hand carved wooden horse with little dot eyes painted on.

“It’s peach flavored!” Lysithea’s face burned red after her sudden exclamation, clearing her throat to regain her composure, “A-and I also managed to convince the kitchen staff for some other sweet buns, so, if you prefer that. That’s also an option.”

Sure enough, plates of sweet buns dotted the tablecloth, each accompanied by a matching blue and white teacups.

“This is all so…”

A loud clatter shook Marianne from her stupor, as well as scaring the rest of the deer. Raphael jumped in his spot, sending one of the smaller packages tumbling down, to which Leonie bent over backwards to grab, tumbling the package back and forth in her hands before it finally settled.

“Sorry I’m late, everyone!” The door swung open to reveal Ignatz, who was gingerly carrying a rectangular object draped in a white cloth and heaving deep breaths, “I, um, sort of overslept, and my present wasn’t completely dry last night, but I’m here now - sorry, again!”

Leonie gave an easy smile from her contortion on the floor, “No worries! But now you’ve gotta show us what you have there.”

Ignatz’ face flushed bright red, clutching the object tighter to his chest, “What?! No - it’s not -“

“Yeah, c’mon Ignatz!” Raphael beamed, “It’s a painting, right? His art’s really good, y'know!”

Ignatz caved to the ensemble of pleas, slowly unwrapping the white cloth from the canvas and shuffling over to Marianne. He adjusted his glasses with a sheepish blush, holding out the unveiled painting.

It was beautiful.

It was so beautiful, artful strokes of a dreamlike sunset. Orange and purples and greens and yellows coalescing into the familiar skyline of the cathedral like the plumes of clouds, where she and Ignatz had sat only a few weeks prior.

It was beautiful, and _she didn’t deserve it._

“Is it that bad?!” Ignatz’ face was one of pure terror, “I’m sorry, I can get something else, I knew should have waited longer for the sky to dry, the cathedral all so blurry -“

“No, it’s… it’s wonderful, Ignatz. This is all so… I just…” she sniffed and surreptitiously rubbed her eyes with a sleeve, “…Thank you, everyone. I don’t deserve…”

Hilda grasped onto Marianne’s hands with an electric smile, “Only the best for you, Marianne!”

Lorenz nodded, “It’s a wonderful painting, Ignatz. Ah, perhaps if you were interested in commissions, you could draw my visage -“

“Gee, Hilda. If you were half as motivated for this party as you were for training, you’d probably beat Teach by now. Maybe even the whole Almyran fleet,” Claude smirked.

Hilda delicately placed one hand on her chin as she smiled serenely at Claude’s remark, “Aw, that’s sweet of you say, Claude, but we both know that’s not true. Guess I’m just better suited for party planning than fighting, you know?”

Lorenz sighed, Lysithea chided, the rest of the deers erupted into the regular squabble. Nobody even mentioned the redness in Marianne's eyes apart from an encouraging nod from Raphael. Claude scooped up a few of the sweet buns under the watchful eye of Lorenz, laughing as the other boy spilt lavender tea down the front of his uniform.

Marianne couldn’t help it, letting a faint giggle escape from her lips.

The room fell silent.

She looked around from shocked expression to shocked expression, “Did - did I say something wrong? I’m sorry…”

Hilda’s face broke into a beaming grin, “Marianne, you sly dog, have you been hiding this secret weapon from us this whole time!”

Hilda’s shoulder bumped against Marianne’s, sending a bubbly feeling down her spine that so often accompanied Hilda’s presence.“Secret… weapon?”

“Your _laugh_ , Mari! With something that cute, I bet you could wrap any guy under your little finger.”

Marianne could feel her face flush, “Th- I wouldn’t!”

Hilda laughed again, a bubbly melodious sound that floated through the air and sent Marianne’s heart on wings, if she dared think about it too long.

"Course you wouldn't! That's just what makes you so cute."

With Hilda’s save, the party fell back into full swing. Her classmates always found a way to fill the room with their presence, warm and inviting despite everything about Marianne. She never understood how they could break into such effortless conversation, but found it easy to fall into their company.

Marianne felt a comforting weight on her shoulder and looked up to see the professor’s blank expression. She hadn’t realized they were standing in the corner the entire time. They blinked slowly in that way Marianne had found unsettling at first, but had come to realize just meant they were thinking of what to say.

“…You’re doing well. Happy Birthday.”

The words were perhaps a little odd, but coming from the taciturn professor, Marianne could feel her nerves calming.

Then they handed her a fishing rod, tied with an unwieldy pink ribbon and a tag denoting who the rod was from.

“Um… thank you, professor.”

They nodded, slow and steady, like a sage imparting a sermon, “My father gave me one when I was your age. Use it well.”

With that, they swept to the back of the classroom to supervise the rest of the party.

Beyond the professor’s gift, it seemed the rest of her classmates had, for some reason, thought Marianne deserved gifts as well.

Lysithea handed her a heavy tome on _Ornithological Variations of Eastern Fódlan_ , each page detailed with careful illustrations on avian wings and beak variants, all labeled and with a short paragraph describing the origins and reasoning, with a proud grin before promptly heading back to the dessert tables.

Leonie’s flowers were a combinations of the ones from the greenhouse and a similar kind shipped from her village, a deep blue variation Marianne had never seen before. The girl even seemed sheepish, apologizing for "being cheap" in comparison to some of their classmates, but the thought hadn’t even crossed Marianne’s mind.

Raphael had actually been the one to carve the wooden horse atop the cake, along with two sparrows currently wrapped in the little boxes, throughout numerous trials and errors that had apparently resulted in wood shavings all across his room’s floor. He had explained it with a hearty laugh, accidentally slapping Ignatz on the back in a way that seemed to shake the other boy from his very seat.

Claude had twirled behind Marianne, handing her a bundle of oddly shaped purple flowers and a tiny bag filled with some kind of crushed root. With a carefree wink, he explained they were good for nerves, but didn’t elaborate further.

Lorenz seemed dead-set on explaining the exact origins of this tea set, from some land far across the ocean called Chon’sin, a long and ancient art and the exact circumstances that had landed the set in the Gloucester estate -

Hilda had dragged Marianne away from Lorenz’ exposition with a wink and a quick excuse, twirling her fingers around Marianne’s clammy palm in a way that made her heart beat a little faster. Once out of the crowd, as much as they could be, the other girl pressed a small package, perfectly wrapped with an elegant periwinkle ribbon into Marianne’s hands, “It’s for you! Custom made.”

At Hilda’s insistence to open it, Marianne carefully tugged at the ribbon to unveil what was inside.

A silver hairpin, no longer than Marianne's finger but painstakingly meticulous in its craft. Every millimeter ached with detail, carved into miniscule birds and horses and deer, woodland animals arched into cultivated patterns.

Marianne could never understand why someone would call Hilda lazy; just one look at her work and you could see every fiber of her care.

"Hilda, it's _beautiful,"_ Marianne flushed, “I - I couldn't possibly -“

“Oh, hush, will you? It’s your birthday! We’re _supposed_ to spoil you, y’know?”

Marianne swallowed her objections, nodding even though she didn't really agree. She held the hairpin aloft in her fingers, cautiously fitting it into her hair with as much grace as she could muster.

"It looks amazing! Well, of course it does, you look great in everything." Hilda shone. Marianne's heart beat a little faster.

"...You organized all this?"

"Of course! Everyone else was super on board, too, even the professor! They let us have the whole classroom. Pretty cool, right?"

Marianne's eyes reflected in the surface of Hilda's gift, "...Thank you, Hilda. It must've been a lot of work... you didn't have to do all this."

Hilda seemed startled at Marianne sincerity, blinking once, twice with her sparkling eyes before recovering. She smiled, waving nonchalantly, "Of _course_ you deserve it," and squeezed Marianne's hand, smiling softly, "We're your friends, after all."

Marianne lets a small smile, even though her heart felt like it was pounding through her chest, seeing Hilda so close, so kind. The other girl gives one last comforting squeeze to Marianne's hand. She opened her mouth before closing it again, a quiet respite in the conversational that lasted forever and not long enough.

"...Well! It's your party, after all! Let's go back and celebrate." Hilda's radiant grin lets loose a longing in Marianne's chest, but something clogged the back of her throat. Marianne nodded, letting Hilda lead the way back to the crowd.

* * *

On that cool autumn night, Marianne shuffled into her room, teetering slightly under the weight of her gifts. A bird twittered on the windowsill, flapping his wings and flickering off into the night sky.

She gently began to sort her gifts, numerous and unwieldy as they were. Lorenz’ tea set inside the drawers, cushioned in cloth, she didn’t want to risk bumping the table and sending it shattering. She wasn’t quite sure what to do with Claude’s blue and purple herbs, so she placed it next to the tea set. Lysithea’s book on the middle shelf. Raphael’s carved wooden animals, those went on the windowsill for Marianne’s avian friends to admire. The professor’s fishing rod… after a moment of consideration, she leaned it against the dresser. Leonie’s flowers went into a glass jar, the two colors intertwining with each other like clasped palms in prayer. Marianne didn’t have anything to properly hang Ignatz’ painting with, and she definitely didn’t want to bother someone this late, so she’d just find something later. For now, she propped it up with one of Raphael’s birds.

Strangely enough, most autumn nights sent shivers down her spine, leaving Marianne alone with her prayer. But tonight…

The faded blue moon cast gentle shadows throughout her room, illuminating it in a dreamlike pale. Hilda’s hairpin deigned a special spot on the top of the desk’s shelf. The light caught its delicate details in its silver sheen, the intricately carved birds and woodland creatures almost animated in the moonlight.

Marianne sat on the edge of her bed, examining the clip then the rest of her newfound decorations. A cool autumn breeze dusted the curtains and waved through Marianne’s room, calming and kind.

Just Marianne and her prayer.

She clasped her palms together, pressing her forehead to her hands. The familiar words began to form on her lips.

_Dear Goddess…_

But in the moonlight, something was different.

_…Dear Goddess._

_I know this is a selfish request. I know it can’t last. I know I don’t deserve this, but please…_

_Please, goddess, just this one night…_

_Don’t take me yet._

**Author's Note:**

> Marianne's development and realization of her own self worth is one of my favorite parts of Three Houses, hands down.
> 
> Leonie's flowers are Lily of the Valley, Marianne's favorite. Leonie mentions having a different color back home, so I picked blue, since they also grow in that color (white is most common.)
> 
> Claude's gift is Gol Gav Zaban and Sonboletip. They're both flowers/herbs that are used in teas in Persia. Since Almyra is based on Persia, and Claude knows a thing or two about plants, I thought it'd be a fitting gift. I've never actually tried them, but apparently Gol Gav Zaban is good for the nerves (and also as a diuretic...? Ignore that part.) Sonboletip is also good for nerves, apparently.
> 
> The Marihilda was going to be a subtle thing at first but it evolved into part character study part lesbian longing. Girls...
> 
> Anyway, thanks for reading! Leave a comment if you enjoyed and/or love Marianne.


End file.
